Fear. Just reading that word might make you tense up. It may bring a flashback of a memory or something you’re going through right now. How can one little word have so much power over us? It’s just a feeling, right? Right. It’s just a feeling. A feeling that many of us have and our mind makes it into a bigger deal than it actually is. We let it engulf us in its shadow.
Recently, I had a fear that I knew I needed to face. About a year and a half ago, I was introduced to “life coaching.” I have utilized my coaches many times to get through different happenings in my life. What is so cool about coaching is that it allows you to use your own mind and subconscious to find the answers you are looking for. It’s not someone else giving you advice.
I’ve had this fear for a while and it has came and went numerous times. Well, it probably never really went away. I buried it. I didn’t want it to become real so I kept pushing it down. I got the feeling that if I kept doing that, eventually it would come back bigger. That was when I decided to confront it. By confronting it, I realized how much was behind the fear. Mainly memories and old feelings. I also realized how big of a support system I have with friends and family which greatly outweighs the fear itself.
At the end of my coaching session, my coach and I were chit chatting and I came to the realization that my fears are like a big shadow, but when you go to confront them, they really are just a small little bug that you can squash or flick away.
Even after that realization, the feeling of fear came back to me even more recently. See, I have been “brainstorming” this blog idea for quite some time. Set many deadlines of dates when I wanted it to be up and live. I always found a way to procrastinate or put it off. It wasn’t ready. I’m missing somethings. What if people don’t like what I write? What if it’s a success, and then I stop being consistent and let it go? What if, what if, what if? I was overcome by a feeling earlier this week that I needed to get this out soon. I kept seeing and hearing signs and hearing my conscious tell me it’s time. And those signs and gut feeling brought on the fear again, and I was short of breath, on the brink of a panic attack. I knew I needed to find resources to get me out of the funk so I could get this going and set my deadline for that Friday.
I found a group of people to share my fear with and they were all very encouraging. I imagined my fear as the shadow and got closer to it to confront it. Found the bug, and flicked it away. I changed my fears from what if this goes wrong, to what if I succeed? What if I can at least connect to one person with my stories? Which brings up another good point. Vulnerability.
Vulnerability can be very rewarding. I have witnessed it. Just 5 people at a table, taking the chance of sharing our thoughts and feelings with each other. Making a safe place. Being vulnerable. Great things came from that session. We all connected. We are all full of resources and you never know what you will find. Even if the small group of people you are with aren’t a direct resource, chances are they will know someone who is.
Fear is only a feeling. We get to choose how to let it affect us. I challenge you to confront a fear you have. Find and use resources. Make sure you are surrounding yourself with the right people. The people you want to be like. Use a journal. Change your fear into excitement!
I always enjoy reading comments and answering questions! Please tell me in the comments below how this blog post has helped you.
Have a great day!